Pace is our second son and child. He is 6 years old. Pace started his Sensory issues about the age of 2. Didn't like loud noises, certain clothes felt funny on him. He would throw big fits when I would leave his side and be crying so hard that he would almost pass out and flail on the ground. I was always worried that he would crack his head open when he did it. One time when he was 3 I told him to get his shoes on so we could leave and I left to start the car, and he had followed me out and flailed on the cement almost passed out, because he didn't want me to leave. He has always kept us on our toes his whole life. Very active from the time he could walk. He climbed on everything at a young age and was always into everything. Which comes to his ADHD. He is always going but he also has been very obsessive with toys. He loved Thomas and trains and pretty much nothing else. So when he likes something he loves it. Right now he loves the Broncos, he will be content by wearing his jersey and throwing his ball up in the air and catching it. He will do this for hours up and down our hallway. Its just how he is, and when he is in the zone its hard to pull him away from it. Technology is great but a nightmare at the same time, because he throws a fit when he has to let it go. I learned not to do afternoon school because it was hard to pull him away from things at home to go to school. I would have to get him dressed just as early as his brother or it was like pulling teeth just to get him dressed. Sometimes I wish that I had some sort of warning for what I needed to do for him or pointers, but we are still learning new things. Another thing we learned is that he has Anxiety and got nervous to go to his Kindergarten Program. I had to pull him in. We still have mornings that I need help from his teacher to come get him to go to school. If he gets out of schedule, its hard to get him back to there again. When his little sister and brother cry, Pace is right there crying and throwing a bigger fit with them. We have tried so many things to help him out and we still haven't and maybe we wont till he grows out of it. It can get very frustrating for him and for us as well. I wish I knew what he was hearing, so I could be a little more understanding. But when you have two kids crying at the same time, you lose patience quite easily. I talk about making him a sound proof room to run to so he can't hear it. Pace is such a loving boy though so he makes up for it. He is such a smart boy with a photogenic memory and excels in school other than the staying in his seat part. His first grade teacher told us that he corrects her some times when she is wrong. And she always has to have extra work for him to do, because he does it a lot faster than his classmates. Trying to keep him busy and focused :) He is a very creative boy and is constantly drawing and talking about football. He loves football and can tell you anything if you asked about NFL. His memory is Amazing, and soaks up everything.
I am writing this blog to help me out and hopefully to help out other Mom's that have a kid similar to Pace. If you have any suggestions please comment below, thanks!
This sounds EXACTLY like HSP (Highly Sensitive Person). These children commonly get misdiagnosed with ADHD and ADD. My Niece (who is 6 now) struggled IMMENSELY with loud noises, transitions, anxiety, the way clothing feels, bright lights, strong smells, (this list goes on and on). She would throw full fledged tantrums out of nowhere that were uncontrollable- and usually over the most minor of issues (the towel felt stiff, the vacuum turned on, mom left the room). Several people told us she had ADHD but we were convinced it was something more than that because her attention was on point! She has a photographic memory, she can sit still by herself for hours on end. And we knew she wasn't autistic. So we researched and researched- until we learned about Elaine Aron PhD. She is the foremost authority, educator, and researcher on Sensory Processing Sensitivity- or Highly Sensitive People (HSP)/ Highly Sensitive Child (HSC). My sister bought her book and it completely changed her child! We learned skills on how to deal with Evie, and were able to teach her how to cope better. In a nutshell- You know your child is highly sensitive if theyhave:
ReplyDeleteKeen awareness: They notice many, many tiny details and they think about these. They can’t turn off this constant awareness of the world around them and of their inner world of thoughts and feelings.
Intense experiencing: They experience – feel – very, very intensely. It’s like they have an inner intensity dial that’s turned up several notches. This includes the 5 senses.
Overload: All this awareness and intensity is exhausting. Like a small baby bewildered by lots of noise and movement and colourful toys they become overwhelmed. An overpowering need to stop the overload grows and tantrums follow.
The beautiful thing about this is that it isn't a disorder! It doesn't require medication. It doesn't require a special diet or therapy. It just requires a new way of thinking and living with your child- a way that is slightly out of the ordinary but very very doable!
My sister started communicating with her daughter about EVERYTHING. She would sit down with her and explain her daughter's schedule for the week and remind her every day what her schedule was for the day. She would explain when she turned on the vacuum and warn her that it would be loud. She started letting her choose her own outfits the night before and they would lay them out for her to see the next morning. She started to create a weekly food menu (picture based at the time because she couldn't read) so Evie knew what to expect. Because life can't always be predicted, if they changed the meal they would explain it to her- the reason why, and give her the details about the new meal- a few hours in advance so she had time to process and cope. They started verbally explaining the feelings she was expressing... (I notice you're feeling frustrated about ______. I notice that you're anxious about ______. I notice that you're feeling overwhelmed.) And then problem solved with her after the emotion was addressed. She saw improvements in Evie's behavioral ticks almost instantly! And now- 2 years later she rarely has episodes. They still have to use many of the tricks they learned in the book- but not as rigidly and not as often. She now handles meal time and school without issue. She isn't as picky about her clothes and strong smells. I could go on and on but I highly recommend you look into her book called, "The Highly Sensitive Child" http://www.amazon.com/dp/0767908724/?tag=googhydr-20&hvadid=48660064745&hvpos=1t1&hvexid=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=8028234500984758387&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=b&hvdev=c&ref=pd_sl_5vu7e6bhw1_b
Best of luck!
Stephanie
p.s. I talked to Kristel (my sister) and she said she would LOVE to talk to you about what you're going through because she's been there! Message me on FB if you think this is what he has and if you're looking for support and I'll give you her number:)